I used to say…

I used to say that kindness should be unconditional, it must reach everyone no matter where they are and whoever they are. But later on, that belief has changed. Personal experience has taught me the truth about kindness.


When I joined Facebook, this philosophy has been my guide in my social interaction, both with strangers and true friends. The premise with the latter is never to judge anyone not unless they have proven me otherwise. With my true friends, it has always been an enriching interaction, by heart. I trust and love them unconditionally.

I was told several times in the past not to trust strangers and I knew that all along but if I limit myself only to those I know, then how can I spread my advocacy. So I continued to welcome strangers but with limitations, civility is always a mark of people with good breeding.

Then out of that reminder I have learned a lesson that my kindness could be mistaken as a permission for a bisexual to get persistent to woe me.  I eventually blocked her on Facebook, Flickr, Linkedin and in all my other online sites.  But that slanderer is still wallowing in bitterness using her FB space to slander me.

Some men too tried to win my affection online too and my rejection of their proposal made them bitter and full of sarcasm. Since then I do not respond to personal messages not unless I know them well. I never opened my messages from strangers.

I used to say that Kindness should be unconditional, but I need to rephrase my statement with this:

Kindness is unconditional with people who deserve it. Some will naturally see my kindness as a form of weakness or even find that as a signal for them to continue their personal motives against my personal principles. So it has to be conditional with strangers, but unconditional with my true friends.


Oh yes, I am aware about the humane aspect of kindness when we have to be one even if we are in the midst of cruel and selfish individuals.

It is not a problem to me. We come to this world to serve for Islam is community service–SERVICE ABOVE SELF.

I follow the teachings of the dear Prophet Muhammad (swt) but with discernment. For Islam encourages the Muslim Ummah to seek knowledge as well and be well-educated. Islam gives high value for knowledge for it is for our own good. The right knowledge can guide our actions and decisions.

As a Muslim, I always work for the best of others. I have faith in dear Allah’s (swt) guidance for I know that despite of the fact that I feel so loved by my friends and family members, there will always be one or two who will not be pleased with what I do. ENVY is the demon lurking in anyone’s heart and can eventually eat the host if they will not rise above it.

Who we are comes second. It is what we do and how we treat people that comes first. This is my lifetime principle.